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Things a SysAdmin should never say.. (fwd)
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Sun, 15 Sep 1996 21:25:32 +0200 (IST)
From: Moshe Maor <maorm@netvision.net.il>
To: gmaor@techunix.technion.ac.il
Subject: Things a SysAdmin should never say.. (fwd)
> 84 Things you do NOT want your System Administrator to say:
>
> 1. Uh-oh...
> 2. Oh S***!
> 3. What the heck?!?
> 4. Go get your backup tape. (You DO have a backup tape?)
> 5. That's SOOOOO bizarre.
> 6. Wow!! Look at this...
> 7. Hey!! The Suns don't do this.
> 8. Terminated?!?
> 9. What software license?
> 10. Well, it's doing SOMETHING...
> 11. Wow...that seemed fast...
> 12. I got a better job at Lockheed...
> 13. Management says...
> 14. Sorry, the new equipment didn't get budgeted.
> 15. What do you mean that wasn't a copy?
> 16. It didn't do that a minute ago...
> 17. Where's the GUI on this thing?
> 18. Damn, and I just bought that Coke...
> 19. Where's the DIR command?
> 20. The drive ate the tape but that's OK, I brought my screwdriver.
> 21. I cleaned up the root partition and now there's LOTS of free space.
> 22. What's this "any" key I'm supposed to press?
> 23. Do you smell something?
> 24. What's that grinding sound?
> 25. I have never seen it do THAT before...
> 26. I don't think it should be doing that...
> 27. I remember the last time I saw it do that...
> 28. You might as well all go home early today...
> 29. My leave starts tomorrow.
> 30. Oops! (said in a quiet, almost surprised voice)
> 31. Hmm, maybe if I do this...
> 32. Why is my "rm -r *" taking so long?"
> 33. Hmmm, curious...
> 34. Well, MY files were backed up.
> 35. What do you mean you needed that directory?
> 36. What do you mean /home was on that disk? I umounted it!
> 37. Do you really need your home directory to do any work?
> 38. I didn't think anybody would be doing any work at 2am, so I killed
> your job.
> 39. Yes, I chowned all the files to belong to pvcs. Is that a problem
> to you?
> 40. We're standardizing on AIX.
> 41. Wonder what THIS command does?
> 42. What did you say your (1)user name was...? ;-)
> 43. You did WHAT to the floppy???
> 44. Sorry, we deleted that package last week.
> 45. NO!!! Not THAT button!!!
> 46. [looks at workstation] "Say, what version of DOS is this thing
> running?"
> 47. YEEEHAA!!! What a CRASH!!!
> 48. What do you mean that could take down the whole network?
> 49. What's this switch for anyways?
> 50. Tell me again what that '-r' option to rm does...
> 51. Say, what does "Superblock Error" mean, anyhow?
> 52. If I know it wasn't going to work, I would have tested it sooner.
> 53. Was that YOUR directory?
> 54. System coming down in 0 minutes...
> 55. The backup procedure works fine, but the restore is tricky!
> 56. Hey Fred, did you save that posting about restoring filesystems with
> vi and a toothpick? More importantly, did you print it out?
> 57. The sprinkler system isn't supposed to leak is it?
> 58. It is only a minor upgrade, the system should be back up in a few
> hours. (This said on a Monday afternoon.)
> 59. I think we can plug just one more thing in to this outlet strip
> without tripping the breaker.
> 60. What is all this I hear about static charges destroying computers?
> 61. I found this rabbit program that is supposed to test system
> performance and I have it running now.
> 62. Ummm....Didn't you say you turned it off?
> 63. The network's down, but we're working on it. Come back after
> dinner.
> (Usually said at 2200 the night before thesis deadline.)
> 64. Oops! Save your work, everyone! FAST!!!
> 65. Boy, it's a lot easier when you know what you're doing.
> 66. I hate it when that happens.
> 67. Why did it say '/bin/rm: not found'?
> 68. You can do this patch with the system up...
> 69. What happens to a hard disk when you drop it?
> 70. Well, I've got a backup, but the only copy of the restore program
> was on THAT disk...
> 71. Hey, what does mkfs do?
> 72. Where did you say those backup tapes were kept?
> 73. ...and if we just swap these two disk controllers like this...
> 74. don't do that, it'll crash the sys...DAMN!
> 75. what's this hash prompt on my terminal mean?
> 76. Now it's funny you should ask that, because I don't know either...
> 77. Can you get VMS for this Sparc thingy?
> 78. I don't care what he says, I'm NOT having it on MY network.
> 79. We don't support that. We WON'T support that.
> 81. ...and after I patched the microcode...
> 82. You've got TECO. What more do you want?
> 83. We prefer not to change the root password, it's a nice easy one...
> 84. Just add yourself to the password file and make a directory...